Dream Lover
by Cleone
Summary: So maybe it was a bad idea to get drunk off his butt and ask Naruto to marry him...SasuNaru. COMPLETE.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: What can I say, it's a Sasu/Naru! Enjoy!**

**Sorry, this is a tad short! Don't murder me. **

**Dream Lover**

A tired and irritated Sasuke sighed as he sipped his sake quietly at the village bar. He had just returned from a tedious and stamina-draining mission and the only thing he wanted to do was have a nice drink before heading home to his comfortable and warm bed, which he had missed dearly while on the mission.

'No stupid fan-girl Sakura,' he thought as he took a long sip of sake. 'No perverted nosy Kakashi and best of all, no noisy, idiotic Naruto.'

But, unbeknownst to Sasuke, he was being closely watched in the nearby trees, where two people were discussing…

"Kakashi-sensei, are you _sure _this will work?"

"Sure! It worked on Irkua!"

"But it's _Sasuke _for god's sake! I mean, he's stupid, but not _that _stupid!"

"Come on, Naruto! Don't be such a wussy! You never know, you may end up taking home more than what you bargained for!"

Sasuke rolled his eyes as he set down his cup. The two men in the trees were not what you would call discreet.

"Good god, can I even have some frickn' sake without being spied on!"

Kakashi and Naruto spun around and faced Sasuke, eyes wide. Naruto grinned, blushing.

"Oh, S-Sasuke! I-I didn't even notice you!"

Sasuke rubbed his aching temple. Somehow, Naruto had always managed to give him a headache.

Naruto and Kakashi jumped swiftly down from the tree and sat on the stools next to Sasuke, who felt even more irritated and angry at having one rare peaceful moment being crushed by these two idiots.

"Can I help you?" He snapped, gesturing to the tender for another drink.

Naruto looked anxiously at Kakashi, who simply nodded and gave him the thumbs-up sign. "Well, uh, you could help by letting us buy you a few more drinks."

Sasuke glared at Naruto. "And just _why _are you being so generous all of the sudden?"

"Ummm…" Naruto hesitated for a moment. "Well…I just want to be thoughtful to my loyal and hard-working teammate!"

Kakashi smacked his forehead and Sasuke snorted. The pair was definitely up to something…but hey, what the hell? Free drinks were included in part of their little scheme, and Sasuke wouldn't have minded not having to pay the bill.

The bartender set down a fresh cup of sake in front of Sasuke, who quickly picked it up and looked at Kakashi and Naruto. He took a sip, not taking his eyes off them.

"Feh, fine with me. Hey, bring out ten more, tender!"

Naruto and Kakashi grinned at one another. Their plan was going perfectly…

**Two Hours and Twenty Cups of Sake Later**

"Ya know…" Sasuke slurred, leaning over the counter and grabbing the collar of Naruto's jacket. "Ya ain't surch a bad perrrrson, Dobeeeeee."

Naruto grimaced. Sasuke was staring to smell a bit. "Uh, heh heh…"

Sasuke grabbed an empty cup and shoved it in Naruto's face. "Have sooommme, Dobbbeeee…"

Kakashi quickly pulled the drunken Sasuke off of Naruto. "We're-we're fine with water, Sasuke."

Sasuke spun around and stared at Kakashi. "Okkkayyy…whateva yer say."

He suddenly burst out laughing and almost fell out of his stool. Naruto caught him and gave his sensei a worried look.

"Sensei, I'm not sure if this is working-"

"It's okay, Naruto," Kakashi assured him, helping set Sasuke back on the stool. "Just-just butter him up a bit."

Naruto's face was full of doubt, but he took Kakashi's advice. "Umm…you know, Sasuke, you really are pretty good-looking for a guy."

Sasuke laughed again and slammed the counter. "I know, I'm perty dang sexehhhhhhh!"

He let out another loud laugh that sounded like a cross between a goose honking and a poodle yapping. Naruto shrugged but Kakashi urged him to continue.

"Umm…so what do you think of me, Sasuke?"

Sasuke stopped giggling and looked at Naruto. "Youuuu, dobbbeeee? Wellllloooo…" He attempted to scratch his chin, his fingers hitting his nose and one of his eyes. "Yer perty hawrt fer a guy, tooooooo…And yer nads are frrriiickn' HUGEEEE!"

He honked once again. Kakashi raised his brow and glanced at Naruto.

"Since when has he seen your you-know-what?"

Naruto blushed slightly. "Well, we've had to go to hot springs and share rooms together…"

Sasuke suddenly grabbed Naruto again and stared him straight in the eye. "Dooobbbeee…"

Naruto gulped. "S-Sasuke…"

Sasuke was silent for a moment before bursting out "Will oo MARRY me, Dooobbbeee?"

Naruto's mouth dropped. He looked over Sasuke's shoulder and hissed at Kakashi "What do I do! I was expecting to maybe take him home and screw with him, but I wasn't expecting to get engaged to!"

Kakashi grinned and laughed. "Say 'yes', say 'YES'!"

Naruto sighed and smiled back at Sasuke. "O-okay, Sasuke. I'll marry you."

Sasuke grinned and swayed. "Heh heh heh…coollll…"

And with that, he fainted in his new fiancé's arms.


	2. Chapter 2

**Dream Lover**

Sasuke groaned and rolled over on the comfortable mattress he was sleeping on. His head pounded and what was worse, he had no idea what had happened the night before.

'Okay.' He thought, keeping his eyes closed and pulling up the cotton sheets that had been laid on top of him to his chin. 'I was at the bar…then Dobe and Kakashi came and…'

Sasuke's eyes flickered open and he rubbed his aching head. "Damn, I got wasted," he mumbled.

He yawned loudly, his eyes adjusting to the light and taking in his surroundings. He was in a small, dumpy bedroom. The floor was littered with tissues that held a rather revolting yellow, gooey substance in them and underpants that looked like they hadn't had a proper washing in months. The walls were dirty and the calendar that hung to Sasuke's right was two months behind the current date. Sasuke shuddered, disgusted; unbeknownst to anyone, he hated slobs.

'So…whose house am I in?'

Sasuke jumped as he heard a loud snore next to him. He hadn't noticed that there was someone else in bed with him. Realization hit him and he slapped his forehead.

'Oh god, I screwed some poor, innocent little girl!'

Sasuke nervously poked the lump next to him. He'd have to wake the girl up, apologize to her, and then get the hell back home to take some pain killer for his murder of a headache.

"Uh…excuse me?"

Sasuke poked the lump again, his heart beat quickening. What if he did more than just de-flower a poor girl? What if his drunkenness caused him to actually harm her?

"Err…"

Sasuke reached out to poke the girls' back but was stopped when the lump rolled over and stared directly at him, giving him a look of utter annoyance. Sasuke blinked, his mind still working out just what in the heck was going on. He frowned, a mixture of sheer rage, nervousness, and most of all, disgust filling every fiber of his body. This wasn't happening…this couldn't be happening…

Naruto yawned and gave Sasuke his signature fox-like grin. "Damn, Sasuke, you were an animal."

Sasuke stared back at him in horror and slowly lifted the sheets to look at his own body. He was completely naked. He yelped and jumped off the bed, his hands shooting to the area between his legs to prevent Naruto from getting an even better look at him. Naruto continued to stare, obviously amused.

"What's wrong…sweetie?"

Sasuke slowly lifted one of his hands and pointed a shaking finger at the other boy. "You…YOU!"

Naruto cocked his head, trying to give Sasuke the cute, innocent, I-have-no-idea-what-you're-talking-about look. "What about me?"

Sasuke clenched his teeth, his finger still pointing at Naruto. "YOU TOOK ADVANTAGE OF ME, YOU ASS-WIPE!"

Naruto scratched his head. "Actually, you seemed pretty willing to do it." He winced. "You were a bit rough with me, though-"

Sasuke shook his head, not believing anything of this. "You're kidding me…you're frickn' kidding me…"

Naruto continued as though Sasuke hadn't said anything. "-I mean, really, when I said 'stop', I really did want you to actually _stop_-"

Sasuke glared at Naruto. "Shut up, shut up, SHUT UP!"

Naruto stretched his arms. "Well, maybe tomorrow night it will be better."

Sasuke turned his back on him and picked up a dirty towel on the floor, wrapping it around his waist. "There will be no 'tomorrow night'. And if you tell anyone about this, I will kick your-"

Naruto's grin widened. "But Sasuke…we're engaged."

Sasuke spun on his heel and faced Naruto, a look of sheer terror on his face. No, Naruto was just playing some joke on him. He was drunk last night, but not drunk enough to end up getting engaged to a _guy, _for gods' sake. Yes, this was one of Naruto's stupid, childish pranks.

Sasuke smirked. "Stop bull-shitting me, Dobe."

But Naruto didn't grin back or laugh at Sasuke for falling into one of his little jokes, like Sasuke expected him to. He actually looked serious about this. Sasuke's smirk faltered.

"Ummm…I didn't ask you to marry me."

Naruto nodded and said very quietly, "Yes you did, Sasuke. Last night, you did."

Sasuke stopped smiling altogether. "Look, Dobe, just cut it out and give me my goddamn clothes."

Naruto frowned and hopped down from the bed. "Sasuke, you proposed last night, and goddammit, we're going to get married!" Before Sasuke could say anything he added, "I even have a witness!"

Sasuke turned back around, contemplating whether it would really be a wise idea to walk through the streets with only a dirty towel around his waist. "Feh, yeah right."

Right at the moment, there was a loud knock on the door that made both the boys jump. Naruto beamed.

"Hey, he might be here right now!"

He grabbed a bed sheet, wrapped it around himself, and ran out of the room without giving Sasuke a second glance. Sasuke stared after him and shrugged.

"Hey, might as well go get a good laugh at how wrong he is."

And chuckling to himself, he followed after Naruto. He gripped the dirty towel as he tip-toed down the dusty stairs (he could see footprints that led downstairs that were undoubtedly Naruto's), hearing voices below him.

"Kakashi-sensei, I already thought of what kind of dresses I want the brides' maids to wear!"

Sasuke's heart dropped. 'Oh god, Kakashi is here…'

He tried to make his way back up the stairs, but the stair under him made a loud creaking sound and the voices below stopped immediately. Kakashi's head appeared from around the corner.

"And speak of the devil," Kakashi said loudly. "Here he is now!"

Sasuke glared at his sensei and made a rude hand gesture. Kakashi merely chuckled and turned back to Naruto, who just entered the room.

"So you were saying that he doesn't believe you?"

Sasuke's anger flamed up once again. "Who would believe total bull shit like this!"

Kakashi grinned. "Well, you better believe it because you _did _propose to him."

Sasuke clenched his fists and stared daggers at Naruto and Kakashi. "I did not ask a guy to marry me! Period!"

The two stared back at him before Naruto turned to Kakashi and continued with their conversation.

"So I was thinking that the brides' maids should wear pink with white trim…"


	3. Chapter 3

**Dream Lover**

If there was one piece of advice that Sasuke's father had given to him that actually stuck in his mind, it was this:

"When you grow up, find yourself a nice girlfriend and get married to her."

'Shoulda listened to you, huh Dad?' Sasuke thought disdainfully as he stared down at the ice cold beef ramen sitting in front of him (Why did he even order it? He hated the stuff). 'Shoulda gotten interested in the girls, huh?'

If Sasuke had indeed listened to his father, the he probably wouldn't be sitting at a ramen stand with a collar around his neck and on a leash being held by Naruto (god, could you get any kinkier and suggestive?).

"I just need to let people know you're mine!" Naruto said cheerfully as he had dragged Sasuke out the door almost half an hour before.

Sasuke sighed and tugged on the collar. "Naruto, this is ridiculous. Take this thing off me."

Naruto shook his head and slurped down his eighth bowl of ramen. "Nothing doing." He put the bowl down and grinned. "I don't want people checking you out like you're _not _committed."

Sasuke frowned, his anger once again rising. "How many times do I have to tell you! We're _not_, I repeat, _NOT _getting married. I don't even _like_ you!"

Naruto pouted his lips. "Aw, you're so mean Sasuke!" He lowered his voice. "And it's turning me on…"

Sasuke shuddered and turned away from Naruto. This was sick, just plain sick. Naruto was really messed up in the head.

'Oh please God, don't let anyone see me like this…'

But it seemed like today was not Sasuke's lucky day. As if on cue, Sakura and Ino just happened to be passing by that certain ramen stand at that certain time. And of course, they did their usual routine when they saw Sasuke: screaming and running towards him, asking him to be their boyfriend and go out on just _one _date with themHow annoying…

"EEEEKKK! SASUKE-KUN!"

"HOMIGAWD, HOMIGAWD!"

Sakura and Ino sprinted towards him but stopped in their tracks when they saw three strange elements: the collar, the leash, and Naruto. Sasuke groaned and hid his face behind his hands.

'God…why do you hate me so much?'

Sakura blushed and cleared her throat. "Ahem…Sasuke-kun…why do you have a collar and a leash on?"

Ino pointed at Naruto. "And why is _he _treating you like…like some dog!"

If looks could kill, Naruto would've been dead right at that moment. Sakura and Ino were glaring at him as they had never glared before (and they had some pretty mean glares, too). Naruto simply smiled and wiped his mouth off on his sleeve.

"Sakura-chan, haven't you heard?"

Sakura and Ino glanced at each other and turned back to Naruto, obviously interested. "Heard what?"

Sasuke groaned again and said loudly "Naruto, don't-"

Naruto ignored him and stuck out his chest. "We're getting married!"

It was as if someone had just died. The girls stared blankly at Naruto before bursting into tears and holding each other.

"Sasuke-kun…YOU'RE GAY!"

"I-I think I'm going to faint!"

Sakura and Ino gave Naruto one last tear-filled glare and ran off, sobbing loudly. Naruto stood up and called out to them.

"Hey, I still need bridesmaids if you're interested!"

Sasuke grabbed the back of Naruto's shirt and through gritted teeth said "Are you really trying to ruin my life?"

Naruto sat down and smiled again. "Nope, just trying to make it better."

And he ordered his ninth bowl of ramen. Sasuke hung his head and sighed.

'I shoulda listened to you, Dad…shoulda listened.'


	4. Chapter 4

**Dream Lover**

The day wore on… very, _very_ slowly. Sasuke and Naruto continued to get many stares and whispers wherever they passed. Sasuke pleaded, almost got to the point where he was going to get on his knees and kiss Naruto's feet, to make him take off the tacky collar, but Naruto wouldn't budge. It was obvious he was enjoying the attention.

Finally, the sun had set and Naruto decided it was time to go home. He dragged Sasuke across the village and back to his dumpy house, tugging roughly on the collar every now and then, nearly choking the other boy. Sasuke gasped for breath as Naruto jumped up the porch steps and took out a small silver key from his pocket.

"N-Naruto" Sasuke gasped. "Please let me go the hell home."

Naruto glanced at Sasuke and laughed quietly. "Haha, no way! If I let you go home, you'll probably never come back!"

Sasuke bit his lower lips as Naruto swung the door open. "I hafta…um…get some…stuff."

Naruto raised his brow. "Stuff?"

Sasuke nodded. "Ye-yeah. Because, you know…now we're going to be living together I need to get some…stuff to move in."

Sasuke silently pleaded Naruto to take his lame excuse for an excuse. Naruto scratched his chin and broke out into a grin.

"Okay! I'll let you go, now that you've finally accepted that we ARE going to get married."

He unbuckled the collar from Sasuke's neck. Sasuke let out a sigh of relief and winced as he rubbed his raw neck; Naruto pulled pretty dang hard on that collar. What, ya think you can treat humans like dogs, you sick bastard?

Naruto tapped his nose and stepped inside his house. "Be home soon or you don't want to know what I'll do to you."

With one last fox-like grin, he slammed the door shut. Sasuke gritted his teeth and clenched his fists into balls.

"What, threatening _me_, dobe?" He seethed at the door. "You are such an idiot!"

He rubbed his neck once again and jumped off the porch steps, knowing already where he was going to go. No, he wasn't going to go back home, and he _definitely _not going to return to this pigpen Naruto called "a house". No, he was going to go see the only sane person in this jacked up village, the only person who had an I.Q. above that of a stick of butter, the only person who could give him some sound advice…

Shikamaru scoffed. "So you decided to come to me…in the middle of the night…while I'm still in my pajamas?"

Sasuke nodded and shuffled embarrsedely on Shikamaru's front porch steps. So what if it was rude? He had rights as a human, and one of those rights must've been that he could visit anyone at anytime. So fuck off, man.

Shikamaru scratched his hair (which was down and probably looked pretty sexy to a girl, Sasuke thought, but since he wasn't a girl and he _was not gay_, he wasn't sure) and mumbled his famous catch-phrase under his breath. "How…goddamn…troublesome." He sighed and leaned against the doorframe. "What exactly do you need, Uchiha?"

Sasuke cleared his throat. "I need some advice."

Shikamaru chuckled. "If you wanted advice, you could just write to an advice columnist. Like, what's her name, 'Dear Yukiko?'"

Sasuke rolled his eyes. "I've read that woman's so-called 'advice' before. The only thing she says is to go to a counselor and never write to her again."

Shikamaru crossed his arms. "What's your problem, pretty boy? You're beautiful, all the girls love you, and you're talented. What could possibly be troubling you?"

Sasuke took a deep breath and looked at the cement below his feet, feeling his face heat up. "NarutoaskedmetomarryhimwhenIwasdrunkandIsaidIwouldandnowhewon't leavemethehellalone."

Shikmaru stared at him. "Excuse me?"

Sasuke blew air out of the side of his mouth and explained the situation so that a normal person could actually understand what he was saying. Shikamaru nodded and yawned loudly.

"That's it?"

Sasuke frowned. "What do you mean 'that's it'? This is a pretty big deal here!"

Shikamaru waved his hand carelessly. "Uchiha, I'm gonna tell you something that you really oughta hear. All the girls think you're gay anyway, Ino told me herself. So why don't you just marry him? He'll stop whining and no one will make fun of you because you have the reputation of only liking guys."

Sasuke felt his face get hot and anger boiled inside him. "Who said I was gay? I'm NOT gay! I'm attracted to…"

He stopped in the middle of his sentence. Now that he thought about it, he wasn't really attracted to anyone, guy nor girl. So what did that make him? Sexless? Prude?

Shikamaru shook his head. "Look, if you can't take that piece of advice, I'll give you this one."

"I'll do anything but marry Naruto," Sasuke mumbled.

Shikamaru continued. "Leave the village."

Sasuke's brows furrowed. "What?"

"Just leave the village, say, for two or three weeks. You know Naruto, he'll probably forget about the whole marriage thing by then."

Sasuke bit his lip. "But where will I go?"

Shikamaru stuck his tongue in his cheek, thinking. "Well…I do have a cousin in the Village of Stone who you could stay with for a while. I'll tell him that you'll be dropping by."

Sasuke considered the proposal. Leaving the village was tempting, and he would be getting away from Naruto. He'd come back in a little less than a month and everything would be back to normal. Naruto would start being his rival again and Sakura and Ino would start up the Uchiha Sasuke fan club. Yeah, that sounded nice.

Sasuke finally nodded and turned away from Shikamaru. "Thanks, Nara. I owe you one." He grinned. "You know, you should become an advice columnist sometime."

He jumped off the porch step and ran into the night. Shikamaru shook his head and shut the door behind him. He looked at the ceiling and smiled to himself.

"You know, I would make a pretty damn good advice columnist. I'd just tell everyone to run away."

* * *

Right when Sasuke made it back to his house, he ran up to his room and pulled out his kunai and shuriken and stuffed them hastily into the holster on his leg. He gathered a random bunch of clothes and stuffed them into a beat-up athletic bag and rushed back down the stairs. He locked the door quickly and gave his house one last look.

'Well…it's gonna be a while before I see this place again.'

Sasuke sighed, turned around, and ran to the edge of the forest where one wall surrounding the village stood. He ran up a nearby pine tree and stealthily jumped onto the wall. He looked up at the now dark blue, star-ridden sky.

"See you in a while, Konoha."

And he jumped off the wall and onto the dirt road leading out of the village.

In a tree approximately twenty feet away, Uzumaki Naruto was giggling to himself as he watched the lone figure on the other side of the wall disappear along the dirt road.

"Playing hard to get, huh, Sasuke-teme?" He whispered quietly. "Well, I'll follow you wherever you go."


	5. Chapter 5

**Dream Lover**

Sasuke traveled all night, and by daybreak he had made it to the Village of Stone. After talking the guards at the main gate of the village into letting him in, he traveled around the streets, asking anyone if they knew a Nara that lived in the village.

"Oh yes," an elderly woman he had ran into said. "Nara Haru lives smack dab in the center of the village. Just go down the main street to some shabby apartments. His is number 666. You'll manage to find him."

Sasuke nodded, trying to hold back laughter at Nara Haru's apartment number. "Thank you."

The woman's face broke into a grin. "Why, if I were forty years younger, I would ask you on a date! I'm sure you have a wonderful wife, though."

Sasuke's face burned and he began walking away. "Yeah, a wonderful wife. Whatever, lady."

He took the main street of the village and within fifteen minutes found an apartment complex with a wooden sign hanging by the doors: Paradise Hills Apartments. Sasuke grimaced.

'Sure doesn't seem like paradise to me. Let's hope number 666 isn't hellish either.'

He pushed open the glass double doors leading inside, the smell of cat urine mixed with the stench of vomit filling his nose. He shuddered and slowly walked to the front desk where a middle-aged man was sitting. The man fit the environment well, considering that the front of his shirt had a nasty-looking brown stain on it, his eyes were bloodshot, and he smelled strongly of alcohol. Yeah, some "paradise". Sasuke cleared his throat and the man looked up from the adult magazine he was reading.

"Whaddya want?" The man asked gruffly. He seemed to want to get back to looking at his nude pictures of women, a practice that Sasuke never really did get into.

Sasuke did his best to maintain his composure. "I need to know where apartment number 666 is."

The man stared at him blankly. "Why?"

Sasuke tried his best not to yell. "Because…I just need to."

The man sighed and stared back down at his magazine. "Top floor, down the hall. Now get outta here."

Sasuke muttered a thanks, quickly marched to the brown-carpeted stairs to the right of the desk, and made his ascent up to room 666. All the hallways and staircases had the cheap brown carpet and the disgusting scent, which almost made Sasuke faint. A few minutes later, he had managed to find 666, feeling a bit nauseous and wondering how in the world he was going to spend two or three weeks in "paradise". He raised his hand and knocked on the door three times, and was surprised when it was immediately answered.

"You must be the Uchiha, huh?"

The door swung open to reveal a tired looking young man with flaming red hair pulled back into a spikey ponytail; he was almost the mirror image of Shikamaru. Sasuke slowly nodded, cleared his throat, and offered his hand.

"Y-yes, I'm Uchiha Sasuke. You must be Haru?"

Haru simply stared at Sasuke's outstretched hand. "Do you always come to peoples' houses this early?"

Sasuke slowly lowered his hand. "It's…eleven-thirty in the morning."

Haru yawned loudly. "Yeah, and that's early." He moved aside. "Come in. Don't expect anything fancy, though."

Sasuke shifted his bag on his shoulder and walked past Haru. Before he even had time to get a good look, he could immediately tell why the room he lived in was the devil's number. The fading Hawaiian flower-print wallpaper was peeling off the dark green walls, the only source of light (a lone light bulb) was flickering above a minuscule TV, and the smell was even worse than the rest of the apartment complex. Sasuke pasted a hugely fake smile on his face.

"It's…gorgeous."

Haru shut the door. "I know it's a shit hole. Get over it." He stretched his arms and let out an over-exaggerated yawn. "Since you're going to be living here for a while, Pretty-Boy, you're going to earn your keep." He pointed to the kitchen. "You see that sink full of dirty dishes? How about you get going on that while I head back to bed?"

Sasuke set down his bag. "Uh…you're not going to show me around or anything?"

Haru shrugged and turned away from him. "You're a big boy. You can find everything on your own." He glanced back at Sasuke. "Oh, and you're sleeping on the couch."

As Haru walked away into his bedroom down the small hallway from the kitchen, Sasuke sighed and looked back at the sink of dirty dishes.

"I wouldn't have it any other way, man. I'm not into guys."

* * *

The week passed by slowly and uneventfully. Though he was doing chores and running errands for Haru all day, Sasuke was happy to be away from the annoying blonde-haired boy back in Konoha. Hopefully when he came back, things will have settled down, just as Shikamaru had predicted.

Sasuke set down a large black garbage bag on the curb and looked up at the blazing sun above him. "This is a waste of time. I should be training on a day like this."

He made his way back to 666, where Haru was sitting on the lumpy couch watching one of those daytime TV shows that featured "wild paternity test results" and lots of crying women. Haru grunted and looked at Sasuke.

"Done with the garbage?"

Sasuke craned his neck to get a better look at the TV. "How can you watch this stuff?"

Haru shrugged. "I like my smut."

Sasuke scoffed. "If there's nothing left for me to do, I'm going to go train for a few hours."

His roommate turned back to 'his smut.' "Suit yourself."

Sasuke grabbed his bag off the floor and turned to the door. "Have fun watching whores screaming about how they're _5000 percent_ sure that some sleazebag is their baby's father."

"I will, thank-you-very-much."

Sasuke left the apartment complex and made his way to the eastern side of the village, where there was a small clearing surrounded by tall trees. He set down his bag on the grass, slid off his shirt, and began stretching his arms.

"Things can't be easy, can they?" He muttered, now stretching out his legs. "First it's having to deal with the village idiot, then it's being forced out of the village, and now it's living with one of the laziest people I've ever had the displeasure of meeting."

Sasuke reached into his bag and pulled out three kunai. He positioned himself in front of a nearby tree and in the blink of an eye, threw all the kunai one by one into the middle of the tree, imagining that the bark was Naruto's face.

'There, Dobe! Take that!'

He quickly retrieved his kunai and practiced this drill over and over until his body was covered in sweat and the sun was setting behind the horizon. He pulled his shirt back on, pulled the strap of his bag over one shoulder, and ran out of the clearing towards Haru's apartment.

The wind on Sasuke's face was cool and refreshing as he ran through the empty streets of the Village of Stone. He disdainfully entered the apartment complex, the smell of the crisp night air suddenly replaced by the stench of rotten eggs. He sighed and trudged back up the many flights of stairs to the devil's room. He stopped in front of the room, his hand frozen on the doorknob. There was someone else there…someone else whose voice sounded all too familiar.

Sasuke slammed the door open, his heart plunging and his teeth gritting together. So his suspicions had been right…who would you know, Naruto, was sitting on the dilapidated couch next to Haru, putting down a glass of water on the floor, and wearing a triumphant expression on his face.

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE?" Sasuke yelled, pointing his index finger at the boy.

Naruto smiled. "I was just telling Haru here about our engagement."

Haru chuckled. "So Pretty Boy isn't straight, eh?"

Sasuke slammed his bag on the puke-green carpet, ran to the two other men, and grabbed Naruto by the collar of his shirt.

"Come on. We're talking," he hissed.

Sasuke dragged Naruto of the apartment and dumped him on the floor in the hallway. He tried his best to calm himself down, but it just wasn't working. All he wanted was some time away from the village, yet here comes the person he hated the most to ruin everything for him.

"Na…ru…to…" Sasuke said between clenched teeth. "What…are…you…doing…here?"

Naruto smiled sheepishly. "Come on, I had to follow my fiancé!"

All the anger Sasuke had bottled up inside him exploded. This guy…he was still at it! He grabbed Naruto's shoulders and shook the boy violently.

"Naruto!" He yelled, shaking the shocked Naruto some more. "Just leave me the hell alone! I hate you! You're a whiny, obnoxious little bastard! I would never, EVER even THINK of marrying you, even if you were the last goddamn person on earth!"

Naruto looked as though he had been slapped across the face. Tears slid down his cheeks as he grabbed Sasuke by the shoulders and pushed him away.

"Sasuke, what is your problem?" He choked, more fresh tears spilling onto the floor. "Why do you hate me so much? Why do you hate me when I love you? How come you won't accept me?" Naruto shook Sasuke. "Why? WHY? Look at me, Sasuke!"

Sasuke's jaw hung loose as he gazed into the deep, blue eyes of the boy who just declared his love for him. Oh god, it felt as though those eyes were looking into him, seeing every corner of his dark soul. It felt as though those eyes that belonged to another lonely human being could look into his heart and feel every emotion that ran through his body.

'He loves me…he loves me…'

Sasuke took a shuddering intake of breath and ripped his gaze away from Naruto. "Naruto," he whispered. "Please…just go. Though you say you love me…I still hate you."

Without a second glance, he went back into the apartment and slammed the door in Naruto's face.


	6. Chapter 6

**Dream Lover**

As soon as the darkness faded and the sun rose, Sasuke packed his weapons and clothes back in his bag and got ready to leave the Village of Stone. Naruto knew he was there, so he had to find somewhere else to live for the time being. Where he would go, he wasn't sure, just as long as it was away from the boy.

Sasuke stumbled his was through the apartment and creaked open the door quietly. "Goodbye, 666," he muttered.

"See ya," replied a gruff voice behind Sasuke.

Sasuke turned his head and smiled. Haru was standing outside his bedroom, his red hair disheveled and his navy blue pajamas hanging loosely off his body. He saluted.

"Good luck, Uchiha."

Sasuke nodded and returned the informal salute before stepping over the threshold and closing the door to the apartment behind him, shielding Haru and his demonic room from his view. He crept through the building until he was outside of the glass double-doors and looked into the distance at the rising sun.

"Can't seem to get a break, can I?"

He ran down the silent and empty streets of the village and jumped over the large stone wall, landing on the other side as gracefully as a cat. By now, the fingers of dawn had reached out to the entire sky and light was spreading everywhere, waking up the sleeping world. Sasuke rubbed his tired eyes and began down the long dirt path away from the village.

* * *

The lone boy walked all day and it was after noon by the time he had found a place to rest at a small tea house on the side of the road. His neck was sunburned and red, his feet were killing him, his throat was dry, and his patience was waning.

Sasuke walked into the cool, refreshing shade of the tea house, with its' rustic, old-time décor and wide windows, and was met almost immediately by a hyper-active blonde-haired girl who couldn't have been more than twelve. Her pink kimono was stained with dirt and other stains and her sandals were nearly falling off her feet.

"Hiya! Welcome to my family's tea house! Enjoy your stay! Hey, you're cute, wanna go on a date?"

Sasuke was taken aback by how fast the girl said all this. "N-No thanks, I just want something to drink."

The girl bowed and dragged him to one of the small tables by a window. "Here ya go! I'll be right back!"

She ran off, her kimono flying every which way. Sasuke sighed, contented, and stared out the wood-paneled window. A small garden sat outside the tea house. The flowers were in full bloom, the water in the koi pond was gently splashing with every movement of the fish, and the lush plants hid the refuge from public view. Beyond the garden, maybe about five or six miles away from the tea house, Sasuke spotted a towering, red cliff.

"I'm…BACK!"

Sasuke jumped as the girl ran up to the table and slammed down a small cup of green tea, causing the hot liquid to pour all over the wooden table top. The girl grinned at him, obviously very pleased with herself.

"Thanks," Sasuke muttered, running his fingers in circles in the small pools of tea.

The girl nodded. "Yup! Hey…" She leaned closer to Sasuke and squinted. "My parents told me to look out for some guy with dark hair."

"Oh really?" Sasuke said mildly and lifted his cup of tea.

"Yeah…" The girl scratched her chin. "Some guy came here just a few hours ago and said to tell some dark-haired guy that if he didn't say he loved him, he'd go and jump off the cliff a little ways from here." She looked at the ceiling. "His name was…what was it? Naku…Naru-"

The cup tumbled out of Sasuke's hands and the rest of tea sloshed onto the tatami mats on the floor. "Naruto!"

The girl's eyes widened and she snapped her fingers. "Yeah, that was his name!"

Sasuke quickly stood up and grabbed her by her shoulders. "He-He's going to commit suicide? On that cliff? Over there?"

The smile dissolved off the girl's face and was replaced by a look of nervousness. "Uh…yeah," she said timidly. "Can you please let me go?"

Sasuke shoved the girl away and pulled his hair. "Goddamn that idiot!"

He grabbed his bag and ran out of the tea house, leaving the girl at the wet table. She sighed and shook her head.

"There goes another free-loader. Oka-san is gonna have my pigtails for this."

* * *

Sasuke ran down the road, ignoring his tired body's pleas for rest and relaxation. He didn't love Naruto, but he sure as hell wouldn't let one of his teammates die because of such a stupid reason. As Shikamaru would've said, how goddamn troublesome.

Down the road Sasuke ran, never stopping even when the stitch in his side was searing with pain. Within half an hour, he was jumping up the steep red cliff, not slipping or tripping once on the loose rocks. His hands became blistered and his throat was parched, but he didn't care: Naruto was what mattered most at the moment.

Panting, Sasuke jumped up to the top of the cliff. The view was breathtaking: the roads below wound around the area like big brown snakes, the trees rustled in the breeze, and it seemed as though you could touch the sky. Standing ten feet from Sasuke, at the other edge of the cliff, was the back of the other boy.

"So you came, huh?" Naruto mumbled, looking off into the distance.

Sasuke growled and clenched his fists. "What is your _fucking_ problem? Stop being such a drama queen and go back to Konoha!"

Naruto glanced over his shoulder. "I thought that when someone asked you to marry them, they loved you."

Sasuke rolled his eyes. "Dobe, I was _drunk, _alright?"

Naruto shook his head. "That didn't matter. It just felt so good to be loved."

Sasuke took a deep breath, trying to calm himself. "Look, Naruto, just-"

"Hey Sasuke…" Naruto looked over the edge of the cliff. "What would you do if I jumped?"

"What would I…wait, _what_?"

Naruto leaned over farther until his toes were just barely on the edge. "You wouldn't care, huh? You'd be happy if I died, right?"

Sasuke grimaced. What was this guy thinking? Though Sasuke didn't like to admit it, Naruto was strong both physically and emotionally, and it seemed so unlike him to just want to throw his life away over something so trivial. Damn, was love really all that complex?

Sasuke took a step towards Naruto. "Naruto, I'm not going to let you kill yourself, so just stop, okay?"

Naruto faced Sasuke once again with a small smile on his face. "Goodbye, Sasuke. The feeling you gave me was nice while it lasted."

Naruto crouched down and prepared to jump. Sasuke yelled, ran to Naruto, and caught him around the waist, teetering a mile above the ground. The boy squirmed and kicked, but Sasuke tightened his grip, not daring to let go even for a second.

"Sasuke!" Naruto screamed, digging his nails into his arms. "Let…me…go!"

"N-No!" Sasuke gasped. "I don't want to be responsible for the death of someone I care about!"

Naruto's mouth hung loose and he stopped struggling. Before he could start squirming again, Sasuke stepped backward away from the edge of the cliff with Naruto still clamped tightly in his arms. He set Naruto down and shook him by the shoulders, gasping for breath.

"N-Naruto! God damn, you almost killed yourself!"

Naruto didn't seem to be paying attention to what he was saying. He was staring at Sasuke straight in the eye with a glazed-over look. Sasuke frowned, angry, and slammed Naruto down on the hard, rocky surface. So this was a pretty suggestive position to be in, but it was the best way to get Naruto's attention.

Sasuke closed his eyes and sighed. "Naruto," he whispered. "You had me really worried."

He looked down at the boy lying under him and, to his horror, felt himself blush. Shit, why did he have to be so…_cute_, with those wide blue eyes staring up at him in surprise, the thin little whisker-marks on his cheeks, the tussled sunshine-blonde hair flying in the breeze…

"Sasuke," Naruto muttered, smirking. "You're blushing."

Sasuke turned even redder and pushed himself off of Naruto. "No I'm not!"

Naruto laughed. "Haha, Sasuke-teme! You're getting a crush on me!"

Sasuke made a vomiting gesture. It was good to see Naruto back in his childish mood, but all the same, it was annoying. Jeeze, he was such an idiot.

"Naruto, shut up."

"Whatever you say, honey."

As hard as it was, Sasuke ignored the nickname and held his hand to Naruto. "I'm tired. Let's go back to Konoha."

Naruto stared at out held hand "You-you wanna go back home…with _me_?"

Sasuke gritted his teeth. "Hurry up before I change my mind."

Naruto quickly grabbed his hand and was lifted off the ground. The two boys simply stared at one another, their hands still clasped, as though they had a silent understanding. Sasuke realized that they were still holding hands and immediately let go.

"Come on, Dobe, we'll find a place to get some ramen. My treat."

Naruto jumped three times. "Yay! The thing I love most: free ramen! Well, besides you, of course."

"You're pushing it, Naruto," Sasuke muttered. "Shut up or you really will be flying off the edge of the cliff."


	7. Chapter 7

**Dream Lover**

'I knew I shouldn't have listened to Naruto when he said he knew the way back home,' Sasuke thought with annoyance as he looked up at the velvety blue sky through the canopy of trees.

The two boys had walked all day with Naruto, declaring with confidence that he could get them back to Konoha before sunset, leading the way. The sun had set an hour before…and they were no where near Konoha. And so, the irritated Sasuke and the apologetic Naruto were forced to spend the night in a small clearing in a forest that neither of them could identify.

Sasuke looked across the small camp fire that he had produced in order to keep them both from freezing to death. Naruto was leaned against the trunk of a tall tree, reading a magazine that he had brought along for his excursion: _Bitch. _His tongue was against the side of his left cheek and a look of intense concentration was on his face.

"What, having trouble sounding out a word in your gay magazine?" Sasuke scoffed.

Naruto looked up from the article he was reading and frowned. "For your information," he said matter-of-factly, "it's a lesbian magazine and I can read it just _fine_."

"Damn, you're queerer than I thought," Sasuke said with disgust.

Naruto shrugged and went back to reading the article on fifty great sex tips. Sasuke stared at him for a moment, appalled, before looking back up at the patches of the deep, midnight blue sky. He was used to spending the night in the forest, but when he had the entire Team Seven was with him. Now it was just him and Naruto…_alone_.

'Now that I think about it…he and I have been through a lot together.'

Sasuke blinked as the memories began flooding his brain: the tree exercises, the name-calling, the Chuunin exam, the meeting with the transformed Gaara, and of course, the more romantic events. The feeling of being alone together, the incident with Haku where Sasuke nearly died in Naruto's arms and…the kiss.

'Well, people do say that you'll never forget your first kiss,' Sasuke thought, remembering the soft feeling of the other boy's lips and the light taste of beef ramen on his breath. He grimaced at these thoughts and shook his head. 'Eww, I'm making it seem like I actually _enjoyed_ it.'

He jumped as Naruto slapped his magazine shut and looked at the other boy longingly. "Hey…can I ask you something?"

Sasuke frowned. 'Oh god, please say he won't ask about the kiss,' he pleaded silently.

"Was I a good kisser?"

Sasuke's heart plummeted. "Oh…um…"

Naruto leaned forward eagerly. "You-you know what I'm talking about, right? That time when we were twelve-"

Sasuke raised his hand to stop him. "Yes, yes, I know," he said exasperatedly. "That was, unfortunately, my first kiss."

Naruto cocked his head. "Wow, are you serious? 'Cause, you know, I thought you might've had some practice 'cause you were _really_ good at it-"

"Naruto…our lips touched for about two seconds."

The blonde shifted uncomfortably. "Yeah, but I was so nervous. I swear my heart almost ripped out of my chest."

Sasuke looked away from him. The truth was, his heart beat and pulse were on overdrive when their lips met for that brief moment, too. And (though it sickened him to think that this actually happened)…there was a bit of a malfunction in the front of his pants.

Sasuke grimaced and looked back at Naruto. 'I still can't believe Naruto of all people gave me a boner. But it was totally incidental; I know it. My body was still getting used to the hormone shit. Mom always said I was a late bloomer anyways.'

Naruto traced his finger in the dirt. "Hey Sasuke, so many girls like you, but how come you don't like them?"

Sasuke clicked his tongue. "That's easy: they're flat-chested, big-assed, obsessive ditzes, all of whom have I.Q.'s five points below that of butter." He picked at his fingernail. "Why did you like Sakura so much?"

He could see Naruto flush across the fire. "You really wanna know?"

"If I didn't, why would I be asking?"

Naruto sighed. "Well, it was to try and get my mind off…you." Before Sasuke could interrupt, he continued. "I thought that if I focused on someone else, like a girl, I wouldn't think about you so much and get my heart broken."

Sasuke felt his stomach do cartwheels. No one, not even his fan club back in Konoha, had said something like that to him, something with depth and meaning and not just "Homigawd! You're so hawt! Let me in your pants!".

"Do you honestly care that much about me?"

Naruto grinned. "What do you think?"

Sasuke's hands began to sweat and the familiar feeling of exhilaration began coursing through his body. This couldn't be…it just wasn't possible…

'Am I beginning to love Naruto!'

He gritted his teeth together and tried to put a stop to the swooping and twirling motions that his lower region was putting on. No, it wasn't love, it was just nervousness…

'Nervousness from what though?'

Sasuke groaned and buried his face in his hands. Naruto's brows furrowed together and he gave the other boy a look of concern.

"Neh, what's wrong with you?"

Sasuke didn't answer. 'You're falling for him, you know it,' his mind chided. Enough with denial; tell him!'

"No!" He yelled out loud.

Naruto backed away against the trunk of the tree, frightened by Sasuke's sudden outburst. "Wh-what? What the hell is wrong with you?"

Sasuke raised his head and glared at him. "I'm not falling in love with you!"

Naruto's face turned crimson. "Wh-what-"

The next thing he knew, Sasuke had sprung over the fire and straddled him, a look of such intensity in his eyes that had never been seen before. Sasuke squinted and caressed Naruto's cheek lightly, causing the blonde to whimper quietly.

"I'm not falling in love with you," Sasuke whispered, leaning so close to Naruto that he could feel his soft, warm breath on his lips.

Naruto smiled. "Yes you are. Stop denying it."

Sasuke returned the smile and leaned ever closer. "I can't help it."

Their lips met for a second time, but the kiss was longer than two seconds…

It lasted the entire night.


	8. Chapter 8

**Dream Lover**

Sasuke yawned and rested his arms behind his head as he gazed sleepily at the sun starting to peek over the mountain tops in the distance. Oddly enough, he had had the best sleep in his life on that hard, cold ground. But that was because he had someone with him the entire night.

He looked down at Naruto, who looked so deliciously innocent and vulnerable leaning against Sasuke's chest with his eyes shut tightly. Though Naruto's forehead was poking painfully into his ribs, Sasuke thought the sight of the slumbering blonde was too cute to disturb. Well, _almost_ too cute to disturb…

Sasuke gave Naruto a hard flick on the forehead. "Wake up, dobe."

Naruto gave a loud groan and his eyes flickered open. "Neh, I'm too tired. Just five more hours, okay?"

Sasuke flicked Naruto again. "No, now."

Naruto shot a tired glare at Sasuke and frowned. "Why?"

"We have to gather wood to start another fire for breakfast."

Naruto glanced down and yawned. "Really? It looks like you got enough morning wood to get the whole damn forest blazing."

Sasuke scoffed. "Yeah, and you can put it out with all your wet dreams from last night."

Naruto snorted. "How'd you know I had wet dreams?"

"The front of your pants is soaked," Sasuke said simply.

The blonde shifted uncomfortably. "It's your fault."

Sasuke pulled Naruto closer to his chest and the two watched the sunrise together silently. The raven-haired boy sighed contentedly, not minding that his stomach was rumbling with hunger. The only thing that was on his mind was what he was going to do as soon as he and Naruto got back to Konoha.

As if on cue, Naruto asked quietly, "What's gonna happen after we get back?"

"You'll see."

Naruto pouted. "And I guess there's no point in pushing the issue, since you're not going to tell me, huh?"

"Nope."

"You know, I can't stand you."

"I love you, too," Sasuke responded sarcastically.

Naruto lifted his head. "Hey, I was just kidding."

Sasuke ruffled his hair affectionately. "I know, because you love me." He kissed his forehead. "And, note the lack of sarcasm, I love you too."

* * *

After a long, full, weary day of traveling, the two made it back to Konoha just as the full moon was starting to shine on the horizon: just the setting that Sasuke had wanted.

Naruto grabbed Sasuke's shoulder as they passed through the gates. "I'm gonna go home and sleep."

"No you won't." Sasuke ripped Naruto's hand away from his shoulder and gripped it tightly. "Trust me; you'll wanna stay awake for this."

Naruto looked as though he was going to protest, but instead just grinned and nodded. "You better be right though."

Sasuke led Naruto across the quiet village, still holding the other boy's hand tightly. He wasn't going anywhere; tonight was going to be a big night for both of them, if Naruto gave the right answer.

Naruto raised his brow. "Why are we heading towards the academy?"

Sasuke loosened the grip on the other's hand as the school at which they were trained came into view. "Because this was a special place."

Naruto scratched his head. "Why? I thought it was kinda boring."

Sasuke looked him in the face. "You consider the place where we first kissed boring?"

Naruto laughed. "I-I guess you're right." He looked at the building. "That was one of the best days of my life, aside from the fact that every girl in that room beat me up."

They continued to hold hands and stare up at the academy quietly, both remembering the fateful day that their lips first touched. Sasuke scratched his arm, starting to get anxious. He was not very good with words, and he was way more reserved now than when he was drunk off his ass…

"Umm…Naruto?"

"Uh-huh?"

Sasuke gulped. "Errr…first off, I want to let you know that I'm completely sober," he said quickly.

Naruto blinked a few times and turned to him. "What are you getting at?"

"Well…" Sasuke took a deep sigh and looked at the twinkling stars above. "You-you remember what I asked you when I was…intoxicated, right?"

"Ummm….if I only knew what 'intoxicated' meant-"

"In this respect, it means drunk."

Naruto looked at Sasuke, confused, before a slow, wide smile formed on his face. "Yes, I remember."

Sasuke felt himself flush. "I…I…"

Naruto grabbed him by the shoulders. "Ask, ask!"

"Will you marry me?" Sasuke yelled.

Naruto gave a loud cheer and jumped into Sasuke's arms. "YES! I win! I knew you'd give in!"

Sasuke stumbled as he struggled to hold the squirming boy. "N-Naruto! Calm down!"

But the ecstatic boy wasn't listening. Instead he gave Sasuke a huge, wet kiss and spread his arms out.

"I'm the luckiest guy in the world!"

"And I'm the craziest," Sasuke mumbled.

**END**

A/N: Meh…kind of a short and/or sweet ending. At least it was a happy ending, ya?

Yays! Linda is done with another story! Thanks for all the support!


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